Stockhausen Monologue

from The Sasquatch Play

by Jeff Goode

copyright © 1991

"Stockhausen Monologue" by Jeff Goode (copyright © 1991)
All rights reserved. This script may not be performed, printed, downloaded or re-transmitted without the author's consent.
My name is Alan Stockhausen.
My weapon of choice is a custom made 640mm semi-automatic rifle with an explosive charge. It is equipped with a laser sighting system accurate to 500 meters, although it is principally designed for use at point blank range.

I am a bigfoot hunter.

I bear the big critters no ill will, but I was once shaken down by a pair of bigfeet. They held me up at knife point and made off with my wallet and 25 dollars cash.

...I was taught to become One with my environment, with the forests, with the streams. I was taught that you must become One with everything and every person around you.
Therefore, if there is anything in your environment you do not particularly want to become One with...
It must be destroyed, completely.

I do not believe, like some of our politicians, that if a particular group of persons is causing a problem, you can solve that problem by cutting off part of their funding.

All the bigfeet in this county know me by name. They fear me. With my weapon and my Zen training, I am the single greatest threat to the survival of the North American Sasquatch.

People ask me how I can hate the bigfeet so much. "Maybe you don't understand them."
Zen philosophy teaches that by becoming as One with the target, the Marksman's task is reduced to aiming at Himself. And when Object and Objection are the same, you cannot fail.
If I am firing 45 rounds per minute, that is 45 times each minute that I am One with these creatures.

I don't hate them. I am them.
Until I kill them all.