This gag piece was created as part of a demonstration of the excessive verbal calisthenics in the pieces that comprise Your Swash Is Unbuckled. It follows the three-fight structure of the Swash plays, but with virtually no dialogue.

(Prehistoric landscape. Two CAVEMEN meet on the field of battle.)

FIRST CAVEMAN
Me hate you!

SECOND CAVEMAN
Me hate you, too!

(They fight.)

FIRST CAVEMAN
Me hate you with this stick!

SECOND CAVEMAN
Me hate you with stick, too!

(They fight with clubs.)

FIRST CAVEMAN
Me have this new thing me invented.

SECOND CAVEMAN
It am called a rapier. Me have one, too.

FIRST CAVEMAN
Argh! Me hate you!

(They fight with rapiers.)

(They continue to battle, as the lights slowly fade…)

~ FIN ~