I parked my Jeep in an isolated location (so as not to alert authorities), and locked my Designer Club* in place (so as not to alert the black-market Jeep rings which, I'm told, roam this city like jackals, looking to thin the herd by picking off the weak and sickly.)

*[It's a "designer" club because it is white instead of red - which happens to match the exterior of my car. So, in this case, the Designer Club is tasteful, as well as fashionable.]