SAME - MOMENTS LATER Goober confessing. GOOBER Well, it's just like Andy said. Otis was blackmailing the both of us. HOWARD Why? GOOBER Needed the money, I guess. HOWARD No, I mean what was he blackmailing you for? GOOBER On account of he walked in on the two of us chugging pickles at the county fair a couple weeks ago. And I guess he got jealous. FLOYD Those were good pickles. BARNEY Quiet, Floyd. GOOBER He said if we didn't pay him, he'd spread it around town how our loafers was light. HOWARD Oh my goodness! BARNEY You need some air, Howard? HOWARD No, that's all right, Barney, I went to college. Go on, Goober. GOOBER Well, we paid him off at first, but he kept asking for more. And I just couldn't take it. When he came by the garage this morning, I told him, "Otis, look here, I ain't gonna let you blackmail us no more." HOWARD What did he say to that? GOOBER He called me all sorts o' names I can't repeat. And I told him, I says, "Otis Campbell, you know perfectly well I ain't but the second and third things you just called me, and that was only the one time with Floyd." FLOYD It was two times, Goober. Remember the picnic by the lake? GOOBER That's right, two times. BARNEY Floyd, hush! GOOBER So I look him straight in the eye and I says, "Otis, my love for Floyd, it ain't worth 50 dollars a week, so you better just quit!" (beat) And then he pulled a gun on me! ANDY What?! GOOBER Well, I knew I was a goner if I didn't do something quick, so I made a grab for it. We wrestled for the gun. And it went off! HOWARD Good lord! GOOBER Next thing I know, Otis is lying there on the floor, dead as can be. Shot with his own gun. Andy shakes his head in disbelief. Goober grins stupidly. GOOBER The End. Goober suddenly remembers the part he left out. GOOBER Oh! And then I dragged him to the alley and cracked him upside the head with his moonshine. Goober grins stupidly again. Floyd jumps up. FLOYD My turn! My turn! WHIP PAN TO